The Homesteady

My Sister's Getting Married! Engagement Party Dresses Roundup

My younger sister Phoebe is engaged! She and her partner Alec are getting married in 2024, and I couldn't be more excited to officially welcome him to our family (although truly, he's been a beloved part of our crew for years!).

Phoebe and Alec are celebrating their engagement with a soirée in New York City this fall, and I rented a pretty dress for the do. Here are the four I considered...

Top: Black Lace Retro Sleeve Sheath by Jill Jill Stuart and Syrah Stripe Seam Dress by HALSTON
Bottom: Side Drape Dress by Hutch and Gold Garland Party Dress by Slate & Willow

I chose the Hutch! It's just so fun. (This isn't a sponsored post, but one of my favorite things about renting a dress instead of buying is that I can try something a little different without committing to a purchase – plus it's better for the environment!)

Review: Step-In Sneakers For Pregnancy (& Beyond!)

What I heard from a lot of other people who've been pregnant more than once turned out to be true for me too – that your body really remembers what to do pretty early on! When I was around six months pregnant with baby #2, putting on shoes got really annoying...and then impossible. I was also supposed to walk every day, so 24/7 slippers weren't cutting it. 

I started getting Instagram ads for Kizik shoes, which claimed to be really easy to just step into, hands-free. Kristie, who was taking on the brunt of tying my shoes, encouraged me to order a pair. I signed up for their newsletter and texts to get 15% off, and happened to order on Valentine's Day, so they sent a free pair of socks, too. I ended up spending around $84 for my shoes. 

I picked the Women's Prague shoe in "Bone," and got my regular size – 6.5. They're true to size for me, comfortable, and they really are that easy to step into! They've been my go-to shoe for the last three months of this pregnancy, and I don't see that changing once the baby is born. They're just...easy. (Actually, I'll probably order another pair too!)

I will say it took a little while to break them in – probably a day or two of stiffness before I got used to them, but never any blisters. (I also made an Instagram reel showing how they work.) After sitting criss-cross-applesauce on a playground for awhile one day I got some black scuffs on the shoes, but they came out in the washing machine. (I ran them through on "delicate" and let them sit on a rack to dry before realizing that that's not quite recommended – but they came through fine!)

And I'm glad they're picking up in popularity, because they're a good example of a product that can be used comfortably by a lot of people regardless of factors like age or disability (look up "universal design"). Accessibility is so important! There's no reason products like shoes can't be designed to be used by the largest number of people. 

Anyway, this post isn't sponsored at all. I just wanted to share a new product that has been making life a little easier :) If you want, you can use this referral link to get $20 off your next Kizik order (and I will too). 

Answering Your Questions About My Second Pregnancy

I asked in my Instagram stories a little while ago if anyone had any questions about my second pregnancy or about our family expecting our second baby, and thought I'd answer them here!

ANY DIFFERENCE IN APPROACHING "BABY ESSENTIALS" FOR #2?

Yes! Firstly we still have lots left over from Miles's newborn days. We knew we wanted to have more than one child, so we saved plenty of things that came in handy the first time – and got rid of a few that just didn't. 

What I'm finding myself really focusing on the second time around is preparing essentials for myself – comfy clothes that allow nursing access, a postpartum care cart for the bathroom, two "nursing stations" where I think I'll be chest feeding most often (which each include snacks, water/Gatorade, breast pads, a Hakaa [affiliate link], lip balm, hair ties, burp cloths, and a few special activities to keep Miles busy when he's around and needing attention), and lots of freezer cooking. I think these things will help us all adjust a little bit better to those early days :) 

Regarding things like baby clothes, I'm being a lot pickier this time around about choosing items that are more gender neutral, and just things that I like better. I don't know why this feels important, but it does! 

WHAT'S THE BEST THING ABOUT THE SECOND PREGNANCY (SO FAR)?

The best thing about this second pregnancy is less fear and anxiety than the first time. A lot feels physically and emotionally familiar, and I've just been feeling less anxiety overall. Having a four-year-old who needs to have his routine maintained has kept me really grounded in the present, and this pregnancy feels like it's gone by really quickly, which I'm glad for especially as I'm starting to feel really uncomfortable! 

HOW ARE YOU FEELING ABOUT THE TRANSITION?

For the most part I'm feeling positive about transitioning from one to two children. I mean, I know it'll have its moments, but we'll all adjust. (That's the best thing I learned from going through the early days/years already – nothing hard lasts forever!)

My primary focus is Miles's transition to becoming a big brother. We've been reading lots of books, having lots of conversations, and watching videos about newborns. Most of the time he's excited, and when he's feeling other (totally normal) ways about the new baby coming, he shares it with us either by saying it in a straightforward way ("I've decided I don't want to have a new baby anymore") or by regressing with other behaviors that we can then help him process. I'm just glad he feels safe enough to be open with us no matter what he's feeling, and we're doing our best to work through it together. That's my hope through it all, that fundamentally he just feels safe and like we still have his back even through a change as big as this. 

Also, our plan is for him to keep going to preschool even though I'll be on parental leave until the fall. It's tempting to pull him out for a few months for more time together (and tuition savings!!), but I think ultimately it would be too disruptive to his routine, and I know he'd miss his friends. Plus we wouldn't be able to hold his spot with the preschool, which feels pretty risky. I'm happy that we can promise that at least one thing in his life won't be changing, and that I'll get the opportunity to rest, heal, and bond with the new baby with a little more peace during the day – and be able to give Miles more of my energy and attention when he is home.

HOW DID YOU EDUCATE YOURSELF AROUND LABOR/BIRTH FOR #1? HOW IS THIS IMPACTING FEELINGS RE: #2?

My top priority with my first pregnancy and delivery was just that both of us survive. We'd gone through so much to get pregnant, I really didn't care what kind of birth experience I had as long as the baby and I were okay at the end of the day. Kristie and I planned to deliver at a high-risk hospital with a NICU, just in case (even though there was nothing that indicated we'd need it, and we ultimately didn't).

Long story short, I ended up having a challenging, traumatic delivery that ended in blood loss and a childbirth injury for me which took a long time to heal, and many many moments I wish had gone differently. I'll of course be grateful forever that Miles and I made it through and are now both healthy, but the experience taught me that that's not the only metric by which we can measure a "good birth."

Because of that experience, Kristie and I are making as many choices as we can that are different from the first experience. I'll be delivering at a different hospital with the help of a midwife instead of a doctor, and we've hired a doula (so excited about this decision!). One thing that's the same is I'm still planning to get an epidural :) That was a good choice for me last time and I'm comfortable doing it again, albeit with a different care team this time around (thankfully).

Green t-shirt dress / Old Navy [affiliate link]
Earrings / Tiny Anvil
Bracelets / Kestrel & Cat Bird

Gender (stereotype)-free toddler clothes, v.4

Tie-Dye Hoodie / Two-Pack Tank Tops
Quilted Jacket / Cotton Shorts
Suede Sandals / Terry Geo Sweatpants

These are all affiliate links.

New Knit: Aldous Sweater

Sharing a recent knit today – the Aldous sweater by Isabell Kraemer. I really like how it turned out, especially the shoulder construction and the twisted braid details at the cuffs and hem.

It's worth noting: the first day I wore it (and took these photos) I also got to hold and snuggle some wiggly perfect puppies, whose tiny nails made a few snags in the sweater. (Worth it.)

Aside from the Copenhagen baby blanket, this is the only other project I've done that used such a light weight yarn, and such small needles. It was a little maddening at times, and I was very aware that I was creating fabric. 

Family Photos at Apple Orchard in Bloom

One of our favorite photographers Kim of Time Bandit Photography offered special mini sessions on Mother's Day weekend, and I signed us up right away. Kim has such a talent for making people (especially kiddos!) feel relaxed and at ease in front of the camera. I adore these photos, which were taken in the apple orchard at Quonquont Farm in Whately, where Kristie and I got married eight years ago.

(Just a note: We don't share pictures of Miles's face on the internet, but Kim made sure we got plenty of snaps of his smiles for our family. This is a small selection of the dozens of gorgeous images she captioned.)

My romper is from Target (and currently on sale) [affiliate link], and my sweater is Gap via ThredUp. (Use this link for $10 off your first purchase.)

Remaking: Chunky Cardigan Into Sleeveless Vest

I'm sharing another remaking project today, in which I rip out an old knitting endeavor and use the yarn to make something new!

I knitted this cardigan in 2019 and just...didn't really wear it ever. It was a prime candidate for repurposing the materials into something more useful. 

I'd had this pattern saved on Pinterest for ages, and it seemed like the perfect way to use up this chunky yarn. I ripped out the cardigan whilst comparing myself to a butcher (having never killed or taken apart an animal for food) – not intimating any kind of savagery, but rather the act of dismembering at the joints something that was once whole, and processing its parts for future use. 

I wasn't 100% comfortable with the pattern at first (and not just because it is written in Swedish). Once translated, it became clear that it was incredibly simple and also required more customization than I'm used to. Does this make sense? The instructions are basically, cast on 47 stitches, then knit 'til it's done. I had to make a lot of my own decisions about how long I wanted it to be, etc., which is of course one of the wonderful things about making your own clothing – but it pushes me a little out of my comfort zone for some reason! 

Anyway, the construction is simple: it's three panels (front, back, neck) that are then sewn together to make the vest. I've already worn it a few times – it's the perfect thing for my cold office and as comfy as a sweatshirt.

Dyeing a Thrifted Silk Shirt With Onion Skins

Last year I bought this off-white short-sleeved silk shirt from the thrift store. I wore it a few times, but never loved it -- it was too close to the color of my skin. So I decided to dye it darker using onion skins!

This was my first foray into natural dyeing, and there are a lot of people out there more talented and knowledgable than I, but this is what I did...

Here's the "before." It also had wooden buttons that you can't really see here.

I started saving our onion skins, and even asked at the grocery store and Target if I could collect the onion skins from their produce bins (awkward for sure, but everyone always said yes -- although this was pre-pandemic). 

Once I had what I felt was enough, I boiled them for about an hour, then covered the pot and let it all sit for two days. Then I strained out the skins and composted them, retaining the liquid. I snipped the buttons off the shirt and soaked it in cold water, then submerged it in the dye and put the heat back on. I simmered the shirt in the dye for about an hour, then left it submerged for a few days (I took to heart the dyeing adage "longer is stronger") before rinsing it out and washing it regularly.

This was after the first wash. The color had changed, but I wanted it darker. I repeated the steps above, but using red onion skins. And then did it again after that, and added new buttons.

This shade works much better, I think! I certainly wore it more often this summer than I did the year before. And the experience made me feel a bit braver when it comes to natural dyeing. 

We got permanent jewelry

My sister had a birthday in February, so my mom and I hopped on a train together and traveled to New York City to spend the day with Phoebe. She knew about most of our plans – going out for brunch, a holistic facial for her – but we had one surprise up our sleeve (ha!)...

We went to Catbird for permanent jewelry! It was something the three of us had talked about doing for at least a year or two – I think it's probably the closest we'll all get to having matching tattoos done :) 

Anyway there are a few different bracelets you can have cut to fit your wrist, then welded closed (there's no clasp). My sister and I both chose the Sweet Nothing Bracelet, and our mom selected the 1976 Bracelet. We waited only a few minutes before getting our jewelry. The welding process was very cool – and by the way, it didn't hurt at all. Sometimes when I say "permanent jewelry," people think it's attached to your skin – nope. And it's not strictly permanent either. If you ever had to take it off, you can just snip it with a pair of scissors. If it breaks or you remove it, then decide you want it back on, just bring it back to the welding annex and they'll reattach it for $10. 

It felt a little tight at first (sort of like having a hair tie on my wrist) but soon loosened comfortably over the next week, just as the welder had said it would. 

After getting our bracelets (thanks Mom!), we proceeded to try and take LOTS of pictures of our wrists. What a treat this was – and I love having something with me all the time that connects me to them. (More info about the welding here.)

Gender (stereotype)-free toddler clothes, v.3

Six new favorites. Posts like these are such a good outlet for me – like shopping without having to pay! I'm going to the thrift store on Wednesday and will be keeping my eye out for some new clothing additions for everyone's closet (but shopping for toddler clothes is always especially fun). 

Cat bodysuit / Texture knit pants
Romper / Polka dot sweatshirt
Cactus tee (on sale) / Bobble cardigan

All these links are affiliate links.